When we stop running from our depression, we can begin to examine our pain, and give loving attention to ourselves and to it. We become scientists of our own pain, and notice where it resides. It is almost surely physical. It may be a coolness, or a tightness in our chest, or a piercing pain in our heart. Though it is at first frightening to examine our pain, once we have done so we can begin to soften to it, and really feel our suffering. We may worry that the feeling is too intense, that we won’t be able to stand it. But ultimately we find that the pain we feel in trying to avoid what is happening is at least as bad as the uncomplicated pain beneath it, if not worse. And we may find, to our surprise, that the pain underneath becomes more bearable.
—Philip Martin
From The Zen Path Through Depression by Philip Martin (HarperOne, 2009)
The first noble truth says simply that it’s part of being human to feel discomfort. We don’t even have to call it suffering anymore, we don’t even have to call it discomfort. It’s simply coming to know the fieriness of fire, the wildness of wind, the turbulence of water, the upheaval of earth, as well as the warmth of fire, the coolness and smoothness of water, the gentleness of the breezes, and the goodness, solidness, and dependability of the earth. Nothing in its essence is one way or the other. The four elements take on different qualities; they’re like magicians. Sometimes they manifest in one form and sometimes in another. If we feel that’s a problem, we resist it. The first noble truth recognizes that we also change like the weather, we ebb and flow like the tides, we wax and wane like the moon. We do that, and there’s no reason to resist it. If we rest it, the reality and vitality of life become misery, a hell.
—Pema Chödrön
From The Wisdom of No Escape and the Path of Loving-Kindness by Pema Chödrön (Shambhala, 2001).
When we are open to our own energy, we experience ourselves as warm and clear. When we are closed to our energy, we feel confused and stuck. So whether we are open or closed in a given moment very much determines how we view ourselves and consequently the world.
—Irini Rockwell
From The Five Wisdom Energies: A Buddhist Way of Understanding Personalities, Emotions, and Relationships by Irini Rockwell (Shambhala, 2002).
As human beings, we are guaranteed at one time or another to suffer from betrayal, conflict, loss, and pain. We will encounter betrayal and conflict in our families and communities. At times, these difficulties can feel insurmountable and we long for a way out of the suffering and conflict. The first step we need to take is to protect ourselves and others, to set limits, to minimize harm. Then, what is also necessary for us to move forward through our pain is forgiveness—of ourselves and others, and of the events that have caused our suffering.
—Jack Kornfield
