“If I were a writer of books, I would compile a register, with a comment, of the various deaths of men: he who should teach men to die would at the same time teach them to live.”    Michel de Montaigne

In October of 2012, shortly after his 51st birthday, my good friend, Steve Andrews, was diagnosed with cancer.  Stage 4.  The diagnosis was devastating to all of Steve’s friends and family; however, no one who really knew Steve was surprised by the way he responded.  We saw the courage, strength, generosity, and optimism that characterized Steve’s life.  And we also saw the deep love and faith that was a source of his exceptional character.

One evening in August of 2013, about ten months after Steve’s diagnosis, Steve and his wife Julene mentioned that they were planning to write a book about their cancer journey.  My response was immediate.  YES!  This story must be told!  But, as time passed and the difficult medical treatments persisted, Steve and Julene were forced to focus their attention on other priorities.  The time and effort of writing a book had to be directed toward life’s more important things.

Over the following year, as I watched Steve’s incredible story continue to unfold, I often thought about how lucky I was to know these amazing people. My heart ached at the possibility that Steve might leave our physical world, yet I was continually comforted by Steve’s words.  I cherished each report that Steve and Julene wrote and posted through CaringBridge, and I wished that more people could be touched and inspired by their story.

I eventually realized that the CaringBridge updates could be the foundation of the book that they were not able to write.  Before Steve passed away, I collected the posts in a document and proposed the idea.  Steve and Julene loved it, and this book began to take form.

Before moving forward to the next big step of actually writing this story, Julene asked me why I wanted to take on the project.  What was the message I wanted to share, and what audience did I want to reach?  To try to answer that, I took some time to reflect on this project.  The CaringBridge posts created a beautiful framework to build upon, but developing that into a full book was quite a commitment.  She had identified an important issue; I needed to be very clear about what was important in this story and why I wanted to share it.

There are thousands of books about cancer and cancer patients, written from every imaginable perspective.  What is special and unique about Steve’s story?  Why, upon hearing that Steve and Julene might write a book, did I immediately respond with such enthusiasm? What did I intuitively know with such certainty?

As I thought about this, I realized that there are many different messages within this story, and each person who reads it will find something that speaks to them on a personal level.  Steve’s words and the stories from friends and family are full of the beauty of many different aspects of life: family, faith, friends, work, and play. Each story holds meaning and will impact each reader in a different way, depending on where they are and what they value in life.  So, I can’t absolutely define the meaning that others may take away from Steve’s story, but I can identify the message that I received and want to share through this story.

Like most other people in our high-stress society, my life has been touched by loved ones facing cancer and other life threatening diseases.  The responses have been varied and unpredictable: courage, strength, denial, surrender, anger, rage…  But I had never before seen someone respond with such gratitude and pure love.  For the sake of his family and friends, Steve fought hard to defeat the cancer, but he also welcomed the next stage of his journey. I think Steve’s response was a reflection of his life. He truly lived each day to the fullest, with strength, humility, gratitude, a generous heart, and an optimistic spirit.  Steve’s approach to life had prepared him to define the end of his life on Earth with dignity and grace.  Each day of the twenty-five months following his diagnosis, Steve continued to show us how to live and love, fully.

In this book, I hope to create something tangible that embraces these beautiful lessons from a life well lived.  And I want to share this story with others who may also be inspired to explore the soul and the interior qualities of life that prepare us to meet and walk with the inevitable, without fear and with a grateful, loving heart.

This book tells the story of Steve’s fight with cancer – the battle that he waged with support from his wife, his family, his physicians, and hundreds of people who cared deeply about him.  But, this is really a story about life, and love. This is a story that is told through story.  It is told through Steve and Julene’s own words in the CaringBridge posts that delivered news – sometimes heart-breaking, often encouraging, and always with a message of incredible optimism.  And it is told through the stories of just a few of the many people who loved Steve.

I am one of those fortunate people.  I met Steve and Julene in 1997, and have had the opportunity to be inspired by their positive and energetic approach to life for twenty years.  I will carry Steve’s famous stories in my heart forever. His positive words and actions, always generous and encouraging, have guided many of my choices and will continue to do so for the rest of my life.  By gathering Steve’s stories and exploring his life, it is my hope that I will reach a new depth of awareness of those things that bring true harmony of the soul. And it is also my hope that, by sharing this, your life will be equally enriched.

~Kelly