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By the end of this chapter, you will be able to:

  • Draft an introduction that catches your readers’ attention. (GEO 2; SLO 1)

The purpose of an introduction is to tell readers what you’re going to tell them. Put yourself in your readers’ place. When you start reading something, you usually want answers to a few basic questions: “What is this about?” “What is this author trying to prove?” “Is this important to me?” “What is this person’s main point?” Your readers feel the same way. So your introduction should answer these kinds of basic questions upfront, usually in one paragraph. In a longer document, like a proposal or report, your introduction may need a few paragraphs or its own section.

Five Introductory Moves

You might find it helpful to remember that an introduction usually makes some or all of the following five moves:

  • Move 1: Identify your topic.
  • Move 2: State your purpose.
  • Move 3: State your main point, thesis statement, or a question you will answer.
  • Move 4: Offer background information on your topic.
  • Move 5: Stress the importance of the topic to your readers.

These opening moves can be made in just about any order. The first three (topic, purpose, main point) are the most important, because they tell readers (a) what you are writing about, (b) why you are writing, and (c) what you want to explain or prove. The other two will help your readers familiarize themselves with your topic. This sample introduction uses all five moves:

Introduction to “Streets of Death”

The Perils of Street Racing

That night, Davey Yeoman hadn’t planned on almost killing himself. He was out cruising with a couple of friends in his blue turbo-charged Honda Accord. The other guy was in a yellow Pontiac GTO with katana rims. The driver of the GTO asked if Davey wanted to race. He said yeah. So they agreed to meet at 11:00 that night on a two-laner outside town. It was a popular place for street racing. When the stoplight changed, Davey hit 120 mph almost right away. The GTO was running beside him, just off his right quarter panel. Davey’s Accord was shaking, and its engine was screaming. Suddenly, ahead, he saw the headlights of a semitrailer turning into his lane from a side road. The last thing Davey remembered thinking was, “Not me, God, not me.” He knew he was dead. Street racing is a craze that has grown steadily in the last decade. Last year, over two hundred young people were killed in street racing incidents (FARS 9). Most of the dead and maimed were the drivers or their passengers, and some were people who just got in the way. Street racing has turned some of our roads into deadly places. These street racers need to understand the deadly dangers of turning our roads into racetracks.

In this introduction, the author identifies the topic (street racing) and then offers some background information. He also stresses the importance of the topic with a graphic story and real data. Then he finishes his introduction by stating his purpose and main point. Generally, your paper’s main point, or thesis statement, should be placed near the end of the introduction, but you don’t need to put it there. In the sample introduction above, for example, the writer could move the sentences and paragraphs around to put the main point earlier if that seemed to work better.

To catch readers’ attention, some writers like to use a grabber or hook at the introduction’s beginning. A grabber can gently spark your readers’ curiosity. Or it can shout, “Hey, listen to me!” The best grabber is one that (1) identifies your topic, (2) says something that intrigues your readers, and (3) captures the point of your paper in a concise way. You can also use a lead (sometimes spelled “lede”) to introduce your paper. The lead is the first one or two paragraphs of a news story in a magazine, newspaper, or Web site. Like a grabber, the aim of a lead is to capture your readers’ attention while giving them good reasons to continue reading. The lead comes before your main point (i.e., your thesis) in the introduction. A good lead draws your readers into your paper and encourages them to keep reading.

Types of Introductions

1. Ask an Interesting Question

A question draws readers into the text by prompting them for an answer. Any question asked in your paper should be answered within it. Questions should be open-ended, intriguing, and thought-provoking.

Examples

What will happen when the earth runs out of fossil fuels? Scientific guesses as to when we will reach this point vary, but it is coming – the day when we have squeezed this planet dry of every ounce of oil and gas it had to offer. Instead of using our energy, resources, and ingenuity toward finding new sources of fossil fuels, we should be focusing our efforts on creating usable sources of renewable energy that will sustain us far longer, without harming the environment. (“UN Secretary Unveils ‘Sustainable Energy For All (SE4ALL)’” 1 September 2011)

Have we forgotten the words inscribed on the Statue of Liberty over 130 years ago? “Give me your tired, your poor, Huddled masses yearning to breathe free.” These were the words chosen to greet countless immigrants as they made their way to the land of the free. Recently, an American-born woman of Indian descent won the Miss America title and prompted a backlash from people calling her an “immigrant,” even a “terrorist,” and saying she doesn’t deserve to represent the country because of her ethnicity and background. But these people seem to have forgotten that America was a country built by immigrants themselves – for immigrants. (“Indian-American Miss America Winner Faces Racist Reponses” 13 September 2013)

2. State a Startling Statistic

An interesting statistic or fact can immediately highlight the importance of the topic. However, it must be something that your readers don’t already know, something they are likely to care about, and something that counts at startling.

3. Make a Compelling Statement

Make a statement that challenges readers at the beginning of the text.

Examples

Although the Holocaust is considered unprecedented, human rights officials say that there have been 37 cases of mass genocide since 1945. (“Sarin in Syria and Slayings in Sudan: Are we in Danger of Repeating the Holocaust?” 15 January 2014)

An alarming trend shows that some of the bills presented to Congress last year were not written by Congressional members or their aides, but big businesses and their lobbying groups. Now, large corporations are one step closer to literally running the country if nothing is done to stop them. (“ALEC Exposed: Corporations Write Legislative Bills Behind Closed Doors” 26 November 2013)

4. Begin with a Quotation

A quote is a good way to pique your readers’ curiosity. This works best with a quote that most readers have not heard before, and it should come from a reputable individual, someone that the readers respect and will lend you some credibility and authority. And, of course, it should fit seamlessly with your topic, tone, and purpose. Use this type of introduction with caution, though, as professors may think you are being too lazy to come up with your own introduction.

Examples

“The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid,” Jane Austen wrote in Northanger Abbey. However, the rate of Americans who regularly read fiction by choice has decreased in recent years, as other hobbies have taken the place of reading or people are burdened by school or work. But as Austen said and studies have proven, reading fiction does increase a person’s brainpower. (“Reading Novels Boosts Brain Power for Days” 26 November 2013)

A great humanist and civil rights leader, Mahatma Gandhi said, “The greatness of a nation and its moral process can be measured by the way its animals are treated.” Yet in America, we buy pets born in puppy mills, infringe on wildlife habitats for our own gain, and allow livestock to be caged and mistreated to the point that they cannot walk and must be carried to slaughter. (“Farm Bill’s King Amendment Threatens Animal Welfare Laws” 20 August 2013)

5. Use Dialogue

Dialogue, a conversation between two or more people, offers a quick way to bring your readers into the story you are telling.

Examples

When I wake up to the ear-splitting sound of my alarm clock, blindly search for the snooze button, a sudden thought dawns: “What am I doing?” The time is 5:30 a.m.; all is dark and hushed. My weary body feels completely drained of energy. While straining to open my eyes, still warm and snug in my comfortable bed, I am overcome with a feeling of lethargy. “Perhaps I should call in sick.” Despite all my musing and my bed’s magnetic pull, I still manage to rise each morning at this ungodly hour to join the cross-country running team in rigorous training. (“While the World Sleeps” Student Essay 1998)

“What’s that?” Zarie asked when she heard a low rumble. “It’s probably a plane,” her mother replied. After all, she thought, the hurricane had already come and gone, its eye hitting 50 miles west of their home. “It’s not coming from the sky,” Zarie said. “And it’s getting louder.” Her mother finally put down the dish she was cleaning with a towel and cocked her head to the side to study the strange noise. “Do you hear it, mama? What is it?” “That’s funny, it kind of sounds like . . .” But her sentence was cut off by water – water pushing into the house, lifting her up, fighting her as she struggled to reach for her daughter. That was the day a watery hell broke loose over levies long in need of repair but surreptitiously ignored. (“After the Storm” 15 March 2006)

6. Background Information

Sometimes the best way to introduce your subject is to start with what is already known about it. This is especially true for subjects that are often misunderstood, constantly changing, or just complicated and convoluted. Giving readers an update or explanation will help them understand your subject before you launch into your purpose.

Examples

A secret rider dubbed the Monsanto Protection Act was slipped into a must-pass spending bill earlier this year, instructing the Secretary of Agriculture to allow GMO crops to be cultivated and sold even when courts find they pose a potential risk to farmers of nearby crops, the environment, and human health. The measure shields sellers of genetically modified seeds from lawsuits, even if the resulting crops cause harm. The act is set to expire at the end of this year, so House Republicans released legislation that would include an extension of the Monsanto measure in their continuing resolution. But, as of Tuesday, the act will not be included in a bill designed to avert a government shutdown, according to a statement from the press office of Sen. Jeff Merkley (D-Ore.). (“Monsanto Protection Act Extension Not Included in Latest Budget Bill” 26 September 2013)

A Pentagon report, released in May, estimates as many as 26,000 service members may have been sexually assaulted last year. The head of the Army has called sexual assault “a cancer” that could destroy the force, while Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel said the problem threatens to undermine troops’ effectiveness in carrying out missions. But military leaders have rejected far-reaching congressional efforts to strip commanders of some authority in meting out justice, saying that would undercut the ability of commanders to discipline their troops. Now every branch is scrambling to demonstrate it can get the situation under control by instituting new measures that emphasize a zero-tolerance message and crack down on alcohol, which is said to be a major contributor to the problem. Patrols are among a number of new initiatives the armed forces is implementing to try to stop sexual assaults by changing the military’s work-hard, play-hard culture. (“Military Sexual Assaults Rose Sharply in 2012” 7 May 2013)

7. Scene Setter

A scene setter describes the place in which something important or interesting happened. It places your reader right in the midst of the action, at the climax, and relies heavily on details to make the scene come alive.

Examples

The young men wade through thigh-high grass beneath the firs and ponderosa pines, calmly setting the forest on fire. With flicks of the wrist, they paint the landscape in flame. The newborn fires slither through the grass and chew into the sagging branches. Every few minutes a fire ignites, flames devouring it in a rush of light, the roar of rockets. It is over in seconds. Only a smoking skeleton remains. (“Under Fire” by Neil Shea, National Geographic 2008)

In a dimly lit back room on the second level of the University of Michigan library’s book-shelving department, Courtney Mitchel helps a giant desktop machine digest a rare, centuries-old Bible. Mitchel is among hundreds of librarians from Minnesota to England making digital versions of the most fragile of the books to be included in Google Inc.’s Book Search, a portal that will eventually lead users to all the estimated 50 million to 100 million books in the world. The manual scanning – up to 600 pages a day – is much slower than Google’s regular process. “It’s monotonous,” said Mitchel, 24. “But it’s still something that I’m learning about – how to interact with really old materials and working with digital imaging, which is relevant to art history.” (“Preserving World’s Books is a Real Page Turner” Associated Press 25 April 2008)

8. Anecdote

An anecdote, a short personal story about your own experiences of those of someone you know, starts out the introduction with an interesting, true story that gives a first-person perspective.

Examples

I promised God I would eat all my peas, but He didn’t care. A confused eleven-year-old girl, I sat and listened to my father pace. With each heavy step echoing loudly throughout the silent house, my family’s anxiety and anticipation mounted while awaiting news of my grandfather’s health. My heart racing, I watched the clock, amazed that time could crawl so slowly. Finally, the telephone interrupted the house’s solemn silence. I heard my father repeating the words “yes, yes, of course.” He then hung up the receiver and announced my grandfather’s death and cancer’s victory. (“Why did my Grandfather have to Die?” Student Essay 1998)

“I had no idea college was going to be so much like a gay porn movie.” That’s what I kept thinking as I stood in the middle of a sun-dappled backyard, dressed in nothing but a spandex unitard and running shoes, preparing to have oil poured over my body. For the last two hours, 10 other young rowers and I had been undergoing “initiation” to my university’s varsity crew team. College is a strange time. As soon as our parents drive away from our dorms, and leave us alone with our boxes of books and Ikea corkboard, we’re free to make an extraordinary number of mistakes and end up in situations that may not teach us much about organic chemistry or Emily Dickinson, but let us figure out who we are and who we want to be. In my case, that situation involved man-on-man oil wrestling. (“The College Hazing That Changed My Life” by Thomas Rogers, Salon 21 September 2011)

9. Case Histories

A case history tells two to three short, true stories about different people who have had similar problems or experiences. Case histories are not based on the author, but they do help humanize the subject and allow readers to see human faces where they otherwise might just see an issue.

Examples

Fred Jenkins never thought he was the kind of person to declare bankruptcy. He was a successful businessman with enough money in the bank. When his wife discovered she had ovarian cancer, though, his bank accounts were soon emptied by the costs of treatment. Mira Johnson took a different path to bankruptcy. She racked up $24,000 in credit card debt, because she bought a house she couldn’t afford. When she was laid off at Gerson Financial, she could no longer make the minimum payments on her credit cards. Then, with her credit in ruins, she could not refinance her mortgage. Her personal finances collapsed, causing her to lose everything. (“Bankruptcy Not Just for Poor Anymore” 11 November 2012)

John Ferris had been working as an electrician for 12 years when he fell off a ladder on the job, injuring his back. He was unable to work for the next eight months, while going through physical therapy. But what helped him the most were the prescription painkillers; they were the only thing that combatted the ever-present pain and he felt he was handicapped without them. Hundreds of miles away and a decade later, his daughter was in labor with her second child. Doctors misjudged the size of the baby’s head and the width of her hips, so the baby could not fit through the birth canal and an emergency C-section was necessary, but the epidural to numb Larae from the waist down didn’t work. In the six weeks after delivery, doctors prescribed painkillers for the pain that resulted from the ordeal. But with an infant, a one-year-old, mounting debt, and a husband who spent more and more time away from home, she needed something to dull the constant pressure on her nerves. And that something she turned to was Vicodin. (“Addiction to Prescriptions on the Rise” 11 November 2012)

10. Personal Sketch

Articles that are about a person often begin with a description of the personal and a small biography.

Examples

For Nathan Wolfe, a 38-year-old visiting professor at Stanford, an ordinary workday can look like a clip from “Survivor” — chasing primate hunters through the dense foliage of rural Cameroon, sloshing through mud and streams, dodging branches and malaria-carrying mosquitoes. Dr. Wolfe says he enjoys the adventure. But he has a broader purpose: staving off global pandemics before they happen. (“Nathan Wolfe: Virus Hunter” The New York Times 21 October 2008)

Miranda Lambert’s songs about good-for-nothing men and gun-toting women out for revenge have shot her to the top of the country music charts. Now she has a new album, a new husband, and even a new state to call home. But the girl from Lindale who likes to hunt and fish still believes one thing: She’ll do it her way or she won’t do it at all. (“The Girl Who Plays with Firearms” Texas Monthly 21 September 2011)

When Should You Draft Your Introduction?

People have probably told you, “Never write your introduction first!” You might find that advice helpful, or not. Whether you prefer to draft your introduction first or wait until later is up to you. Either way, you should start out by writing down your paper’s topic, purpose, and main point. Those are the three most important introductory moves, which will allow you to “tell them what you’re going to tell them.” With these three moves figured out, you should be able to draft a version of your introduction as soon as you feel ready. Of course, you will need to revise your introduction when you finish drafting the rest of the paper, but you were going to revise it anyway. So, whether you write your introduction first or last is up to you. Choose the strategy that works for you.

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Power of the Pen Copyright © 2020 by Pamela Bond is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License, except where otherwise noted.

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